Mark, I love you

I am blessed with a friend so good to me. Who stood by me for 2 years. Lol, I could still remember the first time he called me on my mobile. I was so nervous that my mind's totally blank, my hands shake and sweat drips in my eyes - literally. The first time I hear his voice. The first time I hear him laugh. Sounds so soothing to the ears. The first time I saw him on the webcam. No words can describe how it feels.

He stood by me since I was very young. I didn't plan to love him. And then as the years go by ... I just cant live without knowing he's there. He's became a big part in my life!
In the year 20062007, I am in love with two other men called, Nemanja (Serbian) and Massimo (Italian). He know's that I love them, yet, he still stood by me. All the people come and go, and yet, he stayed there for me, sticking with me, loving me, and making me laugh when I can't even smile! It is the year 2009 now. And I feel that he might be the one. I am proud to say that I have found real "love".

I felt happy when he's happy and having fun. I even cried, literally when I know that he is scared, sad, alone in hard times. I burst to tears at the end of my rooftop, 12 storeys high, in the mist of rain, after he IM me saying that the plane that he's on to Florida suddenly dropped down fast from the high sky. At that very moment .. I am stoned, broken to pieces. I feel so numb to see this bitter end of disastrous illusions.

After he told me that he was okay, I felt better. But I can't help it bursting to tears when I think to myself, what if the plane really crashed and he's gone?! Or how'd I grow, before I said goodbye. My mind is clouded with suicidal thoughts. As I know, that he is true love, as Love can be. And I can never find it anywhere in anyone ever again. A piece of me will die with your last breathe, dearest.

How can I feel those feelings? Even when I haven't met him in real life? How does that feelings generate through me? The feelings are true. And so is my love towards him.
You take my breathe away, but I'll never taste your lips as fate keeps me locked away. I must close my eyes to see your face.

From the bottom of my heart, I love you, Mark